Wed 25 Jan 2006
I did some more thinking on that topic and really what it comes down to is the good old “nature versus nurture depate”.
Can you be either Australian or German by nature? I mean this is really what we’re saying when we say that someone is ‘half one and half the other’. But the more I think about it the more I have to agree that this is a load of rubbish. And I think that is where my frustration/desperation lies … no-one is German because of their genes, or Australian for that matter.
Not that I have read any intelligent research on that topic to be talking from an informed perspective, but as far as I can gather there’s no “German gene”, hence for my daughters to have a German heritage I have to nurture them in that way … I have to be the one creating that heritage.
Pretty big task, should you ask me … people are so flawed, how can anybody be sure that what I’m ’selling’ as German really is German.
Hmmm … don’t think that I’ve got any more to say about this matter for the moment, so I might just close right here!
January 25th, 2006 at 10:29 pm
I think what you’re talking about here is ‘culture’, which like you say, obviously isn’t genetic. But then what does it mean for a child to be half german and half australian? Maybe all it really means is that one parent is german and one australian… in fact, it doesn’t really say much about the child at all, just the parents! So yeah, it’s up to you (or us
to nurture our kids in our cultures.
Also, I dunno that it’s German heritage that’s important… it’s your heritage that’s important (and that just happens to be mostly German with your mum’s great influences). So do you really need to be sure that what you’re “selling as German really is German”? It’s you… that’s what matters.
January 26th, 2006 at 2:15 pm
Thanks for the comment, it always helps having something written down. It somehow focuses and refines the thought process.
I agree that it’s MY culture that’s important, but I’ll pass that on all the time if I want to or not, conciously and unciously, because all I can give is what and who I am. So of course they’ll learn MY culture all the time, everyday just by having me as their mum and they’re probably going to take more away than what I want them to come away with … they just learn everything from me good things as well as bad things.
I think, what I really meant in my original post was that I want for them to love and appreciate both those backgrounds. Yes I agree that it’s not really them but US, that creates that background, but I guess, I want them to take it on as THEIR background as well, including the language.
I just want them to be equally comfortable speaking, but also reading and writing, English AND German. Which might just not be possible because the environment that we live in has got such a strong influence and children just long to fit in and are so keen to adapt in order to fit in.
I think that is really where my main fear lies, that they’ll reject German cause we live in Australia and vise versa if or when we move to Germany their appreciation for the English language is gonna suffer (though that’s more unlikely the way English is pushed and supported in Germany).
January 26th, 2006 at 3:13 pm
Yeah, I think that living in Germany they’ll be exposed to enough of both languages consistantly. If you restrict it to languages, I reckon that’s possible: a kid can learn both languages really well if you’re living in the non-English speaking country.
But I thought you meant more “who they are”…their cultural background, the way they do things, are they German or are they Australian? In that way I don’t think they can be either or both. They’ll be some sort of mix.
For example, for breakfast they’ll (hopefully) meticulously lay out the breakfast table and wait for everyone to sit before enjoying a big social event, and in that way be German.
But when someone asks if they’d mind shifting along a few seats, hopefully they’ll reply “No worries” and in that way be Australian
(I can’t think of a real example).
January 27th, 2006 at 11:30 am
Hallo euch beide,
Culture is such an elusive concept, isn’t it? It is at once all around us, saturating us, and simultaneously so hard to grab hold of.
Very enjoyable to read the discussion because I thought about all this stuff moving between germany and australia too - obviously I wasn’t grappling with how to raise a child between the two countries, but I was trying to make sense of what it ‘meant’ to be in Germany and what it ‘meant’ to be in Australia.
But yeah I think culture springs from us whether we are trying to bequeath it or not (after all, where does culture come from other than people?) - Franzie you will be giving Miriam and Esther a sense of Germany in the most natural and automatic way. But I understand the responsibility you feel..
January 27th, 2006 at 12:07 pm
Thanks for the discussion, guys!!
I really do enjoy this process of reading and writing, it helps to think things through. I find it very satisfying and productive.
Well to round things off, the more I think about it, the more I realise it really isn’t culture that I’m worried about (in terms of German vs. Australian), who cares whether they get extatic about filling boots for Nikolaustag. Our home culture is much more valuable to me than the culture of a specific country.
What I’m worried about is the language. Will it be possible for me to raise M+E fully bilingual, so that they are equally comfortable with both English and German both spoken and written? Is that possible at all for children to achieve, or for any person for that matter?
I mean that this blog is all in English really says a lot (my German is getting quite bad and I find it a lot easier to express things in English … though I have thought of posting in German sometimes to counteract that). But what can I pass on to them with me loosing the German slowly.
Hmmmm …………